Bad date culture for Indian-American Sonali Chandra

Written by Phia Baruch.

In a society where women are expected to adapt their behavior to certain expectations in order to ‘count’, the Indian-American Sonali Chandra is like a black swan. She is known for her performance on “The Dr. Phil Show”, where she shares her minimal dating experiences from her perspective on Indian culture. She has little to do with today’s dating norms and expectations. And especially not with the social emphasis on superficially praising all-dissolving superficial sex.

It was a shocking announcement to the rather extensive viewership of Dr. Phil Show as they calmly explained that she is 35 years old and still a virgin. This is not about the zodiac sign of a person born in this astrological period, but about a beautiful and versatile talented woman who lived to be 35 years old without sexual contact. Sonali Chandra does not share the usual expectations in this field at all, but at the same time takes the lead in society in a completely different way and is therefore also quite successful.

The Indian American dancer, model and comedian, but to say that she is just a beautiful and funny doll in the human window does not do her justice. Sonali was born in New Jersey and has parents from India. Sonali started dancing as a child and learned Indian classical dance. Growing up, she immersed herself in Bollywood fusion and Western choreography routines. The classical training later proved to be a really good basis for Sonali for all other dance forms.

Her school years were not exactly happy. In American culture, you are expelled during your school days if you are not allowed to attend sleepovers, go on dates, or go to prom. And later as a student, she was not even allowed to sleep at the university, but she was busy graduating.

Her first job was at McDonald’s as a cashier when she went to high school, where she learned the value of money, and she still believes that “every penny counts”. After high school, Sonali graduated in finance from Rutgers Business School in New Jersey at the age of 20 and continued to work in New York’s financial real estate industry.

After graduating, she refused to let her parents arrange her marriage, which is traditional in her culture. She got pretty upset that her parents kept picking it up and shutting themselves out of it.

She continued to evolve and became more and more famous in TV country. There it was announced that she got her first kiss when she was 26 years old but is still a virgin. After a few friends with men, Sonali was disappointed again and again and was even dumped directly by men when she told them she was still a virgin.

She was interviewed on “The Dr. Phil Show” in December 2020 to talk about her confusion. She did not understand why the men who date her leave her after they find out she is a virgin. If you think about it, it sounds pretty crazy. And
Despite her frustrations with dating during the pandemic, Sonali is still trying to find the love of her life and is active on dating apps.

Sonali now lives in Los Angeles, California, is vegan, passionate about fitness and works at the Equinox Fitness Club. Mental health, financial stability, and awareness of domestic violence in Indian-American families are important to Sonali. When she’s not working, she performs stand-up comedy at comedy clubs in LA.

In a world that Sonali believes devalues ​​women, Sonali realizes her worth and maintains her self-esteem and morals. It makes her kind of lonely, and many people think she takes her own sense of honor and attitudes too seriously.

For men who go on adventures in love, certain expectations of women in the social sphere can also put too much pressure on them. One should meet each other as much as possible. Both physical and spiritual love are not present as instantaneously as people like to suggest, but usually require time and development. And perhaps Sonali Chandra’s natural spontaneity has been suppressed for much of her upbringing.

In return, she hopes her story of her experiences will resonate with women who feel pressured in today’s dating culture.

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